


threads

by rosekings



Category: The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, This is so angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-31 02:08:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13965063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosekings/pseuds/rosekings
Summary: "Newt, I'm so sorry - I can't believe I forgot - why didn't you just call me?""Because I shouldn't have to!" Newt yells, his eyes pricking with tears, and suddenly it's all too much, too much for him to keep in anymore. "You're supposed to remember! Where have you evenbeenlately, Thomas? Because I sure as hell haven't seen you!"





	threads

**Author's Note:**

> any AU where the gang is college-age is my reason for living so i hope you guys enjoy this

Newt can feel the threads holding him and Thomas together unraveling. They stretch and pull until, one by one, they start snapping. It's the little things at first, but Newt brushes them aside, blaming them on senior stress: saying Thomas's name multiple times to get his attention, carrying him to bed after he falls asleep during their weekly movie, the lack of a good morning kiss because he's already up and gone before the sun rises. _It'll get better,_ Newt tells himself. _Just make it through this month._

But the first month turns into two. Then two turns into four, and four into seven, and before Newt knows it, he's standing at the beginning of March, watching as his best friend and the love of his life slips through his fingers.

* * *

The bed is empty for the hundredth time. The space to Newt's right is cold and devoid of Thomas's presence, the sheets still made up like they were that morning. Newt pushes back the blankets and steps out of the bedroom. It's late, somewhere in the tiny headspace of not-night-not-morning. Situated at the kitchen table is the black outline of Thomas, silhouetted by the dull white glow from his laptop, and there's a stack of notebooks to his right, a coffee mug to his left. 

"Tommy?"

Thomas raises his head and looks over his shoulder. Even from a distance Newt can tell how heavy his eyes are. "Hey."

"Why are you still up?" he asks, stepping closer.

Thomas looks back to his laptop, scrubbing a hand over his face. "I'm just finishing this paper for Professor Paige."

"It's four in the morning."

"Yeah, I know, but it's due soon and I want to make sure I get it done right. Plus I've got that thing for Janson and then Minho wants me to proof his essay and I told him I would -"

Newt gently places a hand on Thomas's shoulder, fingers reaching out until they twine with his hair. "You need some sleep, Thomas. You can't be Superman if you're dead on your feet."

Thomas shakes his head, dragging himself closer to his laptop and away from Newt's hands. "I'm almost done. I promise."

Newt sighs, knowing it's pointless to try and convince him otherwise. "Do you want me to wait up?"

"No, no, of course not. Go to bed. Five more minutes, I swear."

Newt leans forward, placing a light kiss on the top of Thomas's head. "I love you."

"Love you too."

* * *

The air outside is warm, the streetlamps dim as they guide Newt home. A bag of takeout in one hand and his keys in the other, he makes it to his apartment just as the sun slips below the horizon. He twists the key in the lock and slides inside, setting the plastic bag on the counter. Thomas glances up from his spot on the couch as the door closes. The purple circles under his eyes contrast heavily with the smile he gives Newt and it makes Newt's heart ache.

"Hey. Where have you been?"

Newt shrugs, hanging up his jacket. "Ku's," he says, the detachment in his voice surprising even himself.

"The Chinese place?"

 _Your favorite place._ "Yeah. I brought you some."

"Thanks." Thomas's eyebrows furrow, as if he's finally sensing that something is up. "Everything okay?"

Newt wants to tell him that it isn't okay, wants to yell at him and burst into tears simultaneously, but he can't because that's not what he does, and because Thomas genuinely looks like he doesn't know. "Just tired. I'm gonna shower then head off to bed."

"It's eight o'clock."

"Yeah, but we're going to Sonya's tomorrow morning, so…"

Thomas hesitates, leaning back on the couch. His laptop is open on the table in front of him, displaying an array of webpages and half-filled Word documents. Newt looks at him in the dim lamplight, his heart sinking before he even speaks again.

"What?"

"I just - I don't know if I should go with you."

There it is. Newt knew this was coming, felt it as soon as their threads started tearing. He picks at a loose piece of granite in the countertop, staring across the space at Thomas. "Why not?" he finally gets out.

"I've got so much work to do, Newt." Thomas draws his legs up underneath him on the couch and looks at Newt. "Paige is on my back twenty-four-seven about acing this class, not to mention all the other classes I'm taking. Teresa keeps calling me, asking me for opinions on her wedding dress and her invitations and her bouquets and I love her to death but her three-months-away wedding isn't at the top of my priority list, and don't even get me _started_ on Minho, did the guy never learn how to write a goddamn essay? Plus my _job_ and my boss and everything is just _so much_ right now." Thomas sighs, running a hand through his hair. "I wouldn't feel right about abandoning all of them to go across the country for a vacation."

"Can't you just tell them all to back off for a week? It's spring break, for crying out loud."

"I want to, I really do, but I promised I would get this stuff done."

 _What about me?_ Newt takes a deep breath, turning the broken piece of granite over in his fingers as the seconds slip by between them. "You left me at Ku's," he eventually says, so quietly he doesn't know if Thomas hears.

"I - what?"

"Ku's. Tonight was our date. You didn't show."

Thomas's face falls as he processes this information. His eyes dart from the bag on the counter back to Newt, guilt painted all over him. "Newt…"

"I was there for an hour, Tommy. I sat by myself for an _hour,_ wondering if you would ever remember." 

"Fuck. _Fuck._ Newt, I'm so sorry - I can't believe I forgot - fucking hell - an _hour?_ Why didn't you just call me?"

"Because I shouldn't have to!" Newt yells, his eyes pricking with tears, and suddenly it's all too much, too much for him to keep in anymore. "You're supposed to remember! Where have you even _been_ lately, Thomas? Because I sure as hell haven't seen you! You're never with me or in bed and even when you're here at home it's like you're completely off in your own world! I get that you have responsibilities and all that but you're going to fall apart if you keep living like this! _I'm_ falling apart! When do I get some of your time? When do we get to be in a relationship again and follow through with our fucking _plans?_ "

He finishes with a sharp intake of breath, the granite clenched so hard in his fist he can feel it cutting through his skin. He stares at Thomas across the room, waiting for the next move as his angry words resound between them. Thomas's face is a portrait of distress, perfectly portraying the turmoil that Newt has kept inside for months. 

"I'm so sorry -"

But Newt is bone-weary and heartsick and he doesn't have the mental capacity to deal with this anymore tonight.

"You're right. You should stay here. I'll see you in a week."

He slides around the edge of the counter and crosses the short space to their bedroom, holding on to whatever resolve he has left. He's about to slam the door shut when Thomas's voice makes him pause. _Every damn time._

"I love you, Newt."

A hundred responses shoot through Newt's head at the speed of light. He presses his palms to his eyes in the dark where Thomas can't see. "It doesn't feel like it anymore."

* * *

The right side of the bed stays cold that night. In the morning, Thomas is passed out on the couch, his takeout box empty and his laptop frozen on its screensaver. Newt gives Thomas one last look, the anger in his heart softening to sadness as he leaves, a lump in his throat.

The plane lands in San Francisco several hours later. When Newt turns his phone back on it immediately blows up with a dozen missed calls and voicemails from Thomas. _It doesn't matter,_ he insists, shoving the phone in his backpack. _He made his choice._ But god, it hurts. It hurts more than he's willing to admit.

His sister greets him with a wide smile on the porch of her house by the beach. He tries to smile back at her but, immediately seeing through his façade, she envelopes him in a hug as he breaks down for the first time in a long time.

"You can have the yellow room, like always," Sonya says some time later, gesturing down the hall. "I put several extra blankets and towels in there because I thought…" She trails off, shaking her head. "I can take them out if you want."

"Don't worry about it. It isn't that big of a deal."

Sonya smiles, the sun streaming in through the windows behind her making her look like something ethereal. "It's good to see you."

"You too, Sonya."

* * *

They go for a walk that evening. It's pleasant, what with the soft waves lapping up around Newt's ankles and the carefree aura his sister seems to emanate. He finally tells her what happened with Thomas - he couldn't get many words out earlier as he was sobbing into her shoulder.

"I get it," she says when he finishes. "He feels like he has this obligation to all his friends. It isn't personal. You just have to help him through it."

"Yeah, I think I kind of screwed up that bit," Newt says, digging his toes into the sand as they walk.

"He'll come around. He loves you, right?"

"I think so."

"And you love him?"

 _More than my own life._ "Yeah."

Sonya nods her head, linking an arm through his. "He'll come around," she repeats. "Don't shut him out. He's going through a hard time. We've all been there."

Newt sighs, glancing down at his sister fondly. "How did I get such a sage and wise sibling?"

* * *

Despite Sonya's advice, Newt takes two more days before checking his phone again. 

"Do you want to go to the store with me?" Sonya asks, poking her head into the living room. Newt turns his phone over in his hand, staring out the windows at the ocean rolling by. 

"I'll stay here."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

Sonya nods, turning back out the door. "See you in a few."

The closing of the door echoes throughout the house and then Newt's by himself. With a deep breath he pulls his knees up to his chest and turns on his phone. He slides to Thomas's voicemails, starting with the oldest and listening to every single one of them. There's almost thirty, each one a mess of apologies and explanations but they all end with _I love you_ and by the time he finishes, there's tears falling down his cheeks. 

The only sound for a long while is the water outside. The phone sits heavy in his hand and the two sides of his mind are at war with each other. Eventually he realizes that Sonya left on purpose, probably so he could get his shit sorted out, so he steels himself and makes a decision. Thomas answers on the second ring.

"Newt?"

The strings around Newt's heart tighten and he swallows, focusing on the waves sliding back and forth over the sand. "Yeah."

"Hey. _Hey._ "

"Hey."

"Are you in San Francisco?"

"Yeah."

"Did you get my voicemails?"

"I did."

There's a stretch of silence as Newt waits for Thomas to figure out what to say. 

"Are - are you okay?"

 _That's a loaded question._ "I'm fine." But there's no heart in the lie and a small laugh comes through the other end. 

"Newt…"

Thomas trails off. Newt chews on his lip, watching two children run down the beach, their hair whipping out behind them as they kick up sand.

"Do you want me to come?" Thomas finally asks quietly.

Newt's heart swells and he has to bite his tongue to keep from crying again. "Yes." The word comes out as a hoarse whisper.

"What?"

" _Yes._ "

Thomas exhales, clearly relieved, and there's a muffle of static as he shuffles around. "On my way."

Newt starts to say something else, something along the lines of forgiveness, but then the line disconnects and he's left with the waves and the sun.

* * *

Several hours pass interminably. Sonya returns at some point with a handful of grocery bags and a pink lipstick mark on her cheek. When Newt asks about it, she just shrugs, though her neck turns somewhat redder. Newt moves to the back porch, sits in the hammock, peruses the kitchen, paces around his bedroom. Finally, _finally,_ there's a knock on the front door and it's like music to his ears.

Thomas stands on the other side, his hair a mess and his backpack falling off of his shoulder. He looks strangely out of breath but to Newt there's never been a better sight.

"Have you been running?" Newt asks.

"Yeah, there weren't any cabs at the airport and it was only a few miles anyways." Thomas drops his backpack to the porch and reaches out, grabbing one of Newt's hands. "Listen, I'm sorry for everything I did to you. I'm sorry for screwing up our date, I'm sorry for ignoring you, I'm sorry for thinking everything was okay when it obviously wasn't. I'm a shitty person, I know that, but I called Teresa and Minho and all of them and I told them to fuck off for a long time because you're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I need you so much and I _miss you_ and I love you, I love you, I love you, I'd never trade you for anything, Newt -"

Newt has no words. Instead, he tugs Thomas close and kisses him, desperately, his walls collapsing as he holds on to the one thing he loves most. Thomas grins against him, their arms wrapping around each other, and Newt feels like he just gained the other half of himself back.

The sun sets behind them and god only knows how long they stand there on the porch. At some point, Sonya complains about the mosquitoes getting in, so Newt pulls away to see Thomas's eyes shining. The tug in his stomach tells him that their threads are finally coming back together.

"I missed you too, you know," Newt mumbles. Thomas gently knocks their foreheads together, grabbing his backpack as he pushes them inside the house.

"Sonya?" he calls out, not letting go of Newt's hand.

"Thomas! Good to see you!"

"You too."

Sonya comes around the corner, a bag in her hand. She kisses Newt on the cheek, punches Thomas's shoulder. "I'm going to Harriet's. See you two later. Don't break my headboard."

Thomas snickers, turning back to Newt as the door shuts behind Sonya. "You know I love you, right?" he asks.

"Tommy, I wouldn't still be here if I thought you didn't."

"So we're good?"

"Depends. Did you really tell Professor Paige to fuck off?"

Thomas grins. "It was more like a _hi Miss Paige, I have to go to California to be with the love of my life and so I'd like to kindly request some leave._ But, I mean, if the other way gets me more points, then yes, definitely."

Newt wraps his fingers in Thomas's jacket, contemplating. "Fair enough. Come on, we've got catching up to do."


End file.
